The Good of failed Relationships.
In light of Ariana Grande's new song "Thank You, Next", which I've been completely obsessed with, I've decided to talk about failed relationships.
When a relationship first ends, it's so easy to think about all the pain and hurt that has come from that failed relationship. Regardless if it's a friendship or a romantic relationship, or whether you guys ended on good terms or not, you might always wonder, "what if?".
This song is the perfect reminder for those of you who have ever been through a friend-breakup or a regular breakup. Instead of concentrating on the hurt and the pain, you have to come out of it realizing the good things that all these failed relationships have taught you.
"Some people are in our lives for a season, and others for a lifetime". Some relationships aren't meant to last forever and that's okay. Those people come into our lives for a season is always for a reason (hehe, that rhymed). It's always to teach us something.
Now, in my 24 years of living, last year was my year of friend-breakups and breakups in general. While I have to say I went through a lot of hurt last year, I came out of it learning so much about myself, what I want, and what I need.
At the time, I had such a hard time realizing that everything happens for a reason, and what I was going through was going to be temporary, and because of all those things that were happening to me at the time, I was going to come out of it so so so much happier. Happier than I thought possible.
Have you ever looked back on the pain of bad experiences, and realize how much you learned from it, or how much you changed for the better? If you haven't, do it. Sometimes, it's hard to realize how far you've come until you compare to how you were a month or a year ago. Trust me, you have traveled leaps and bounds to get where you are today.
In that time since your last failed relationship, you have grown into the strong, amazing person that you are today. At the end of the day, all I have to say is "I'm so fucking grateful for my ex (may they be ex-friends or ex-romantic partners)".
Wishing you a wonderful day/night. Sending you love, strength, and positivity.
-Melina xxx
I've listened to her song many times but never really thought about the lyrics! I've learnt so much from previous relationships and feel it's made me who I am today. I just wish I could tell myself this or seen this post when I was going through the hard times in the past.
I'm so glad to hear hat you enjoyed this post! I recently got out of a long relationship, and I've been trying to be positive about the whole thing, and remind myself of the good of this failed relationship. Thank you so so much for reading and commenting xx
Lot of honest wisdom in this post
Thank you! I try to write from experience in hopes that it helps someone else. Thanks for reading and commenting Alex 🙂 xx
It's true.. some forevers are shorter than others.
Thank you for that wonderful post.
Georgina | https://georginawangui.com/
Thank you for reading Georgina 🙂 x
100% believe and agree with this. I've had people before who I couldn't imagine life without. And then suddenly life goes on and you realise you're fine. Last year I 'broke-up' with my oldest friend of 13 years and it taught me so many lessons.
I often find we attract people similar to how we feel. When you feel insecure, you connect with other insecure people etc. And then when you grow and viewpoint changes, sometimes the friendships or relationships look completely different. LOVE this post!!! xx
I completely relate to this comment! It's so true. There are so many people that you envision they being with you through all these milestones, and then they're not in your life anymore, and you're in turmoil. Then you realize...wait, I'm actually fine without them? 3 years ago my friendship of over 10 years ended, and while it was super upsetting to lose a friend you had so many memories with, and that you felt like they've just been with you through so many phases and evolutions of yourself, that it really sucks. Now, looking back on it, there was so much going on that it was definitely for the best.
It's true, I feel like sometimes I choose people according to how I feel about myself. If I feel insecure about myself, then I choose people that I think I deserve (in terms of relationships). Thanks so much for your thoughtful comment, you really got me to thinking about a lot! xx
Sometimes I think though, how much more growth and change is still to occur, and how rare it is for someone who was there in the early twenties, to be their 10 years later. I try to not get too hung up on past memories now, and just focus on people in my life presently. xx
YOU'RE SUPER RIGHT!! THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY LOVE! REALLY GREAT POST! 💖
Thank you so much for the kind words Kels! Thanks for reading and commenting xxx
YESSS! To ALL of this! I am a big believer in that everything happens for a reason. And that even with break-ups you learn something from them. For romantic break-ups it pushes you that much closer to finding the love of your life. And while it sucks and hurts to lose a friendship, it opens the space to have someone else who actually wants to be there. Sending you huge hugs. This past year was also painful in terms of friendship break-ups. But it also made me appreciate my friends who were there for me through thick and thin. I hope this year is better! <3
Yes, I completely agree with everything you mentioned. I am also a believer of everything happens for a reason, but sometimes (espeically during the moment) it's a little hard to remember that. I definitely love and appreciate those friends that have been with me through everything I've been through, no matter whether it was good or bad. 2018 has been an amazing year for me, and I have a feeling that 2019 treats me even better 🙂 Thank you so much for reading and your amazing comment xxx
Yes!!! Failed relationships are such big learning experiences in life. I hate how I couldn't see it when I was younger but I'm happy to look back at all my failed relationships and look at the positive I can learn from the relationships and how I can change as well.
Some failed relationships are for the best!
I'm so glad that you could relate to this! I completely agree, most, if not all failed relationships are for the best. You always learn something. Thank you so much for reading and for your comment! xx